{"product_id":"the-dildo-of-consequences-rarely-arrives-lubricated-pvc-patch","title":"The Dildo of Consequences — Rarely Arrives Lubricated PVC Patch","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eThe Dildo of Consequences — Rarely Arrives Lubricated. An angry bomb with teeth, flames, and zero sympathy for your situation. The patch that perfectly captures the moment you realize your decisions have caught up with you. Premium PVC, hook \u0026amp; loop backed.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul class=\"[li_\u0026amp;]:mb-0 [li_\u0026amp;]:mt-1 [li_\u0026amp;]:gap-1 [\u0026amp;:not(:last-child)_ul]:pb-1 [\u0026amp;:not(:last-child)_ol]:pb-1 list-disc flex flex-col gap-1 pl-8 mb-3\"\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"font-claude-response-body whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003ePremium PVC rubber construction\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"font-claude-response-body whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eHook \u0026amp; loop backing\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"font-claude-response-body whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eRectangular shaped patch\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"font-claude-response-body whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eBlack, red, and gold colorway\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"font-claude-response-body whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eFor people currently experiencing consequences\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Pocket Tank Patchez","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":48621592936703,"sku":null,"price":6.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0822\/3401\/5999\/files\/IMG_2619-Photoroom.jpg?v=1780260886","url":"https:\/\/ptpatch.com\/products\/the-dildo-of-consequences-rarely-arrives-lubricated-pvc-patch","provider":"Pocket Tank Patchez","version":"1.0","type":"link"}